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On the other hand, while mom and son may not see or talk to one another very often, if he can't make a decision in his life without her approval or validation, that's a sign of a seriously unhealthy attachment.Q: When evaluating the health of a guy's relationship with his mom, what do you recommend a woman look for? Mandel: A guy with a healthy relationship with his mother can say "no" to her, make choices and decisions on his own, have an intimate relationship with a woman without fearing his mom will be jealous or intrude in his relationship, and likes it when mom is busy and enjoying her own life with or without a spouse.

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I have also smelled my mother-in-law's worn panties.

Puzzled as to why when he's around his mother, your man acts more like a boy? D., author of "Dump That Chump: From Doormat to Diva in Only Nine Steps-- A Guide to Getting Over Mr. Mandel: Guys who have always been coddled and indulged by their moms often become "mama's boys." Moms who do this tend to be fairly needy (especially when it comes to male attention) and therefore seek to create a relationship in which someone will be very dependent upon her.

In essence, your guy has become his mom's pseudo-husband, and consciously or unconsciously, he likes the importance of this role.

Of course, this makes it hard for him to commit to another woman -- namely, you.

Q: What's the difference between a man having a "healthy" attachment to his mother and an "unhealthy" one? Mandel: While you might find it odd that he's calling or even visiting his mother daily, the frequency of contact a guy has with his mom doesn't determine how healthy or unhealthy his attachment is to her. If both mom and son have mutual respect for one another and have set good boundaries with each other (if he's able to say "Thanks but no thanks for the new underwear you bought me, Ma.

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